This is not elegant, but it is super functional

That (below) is the corner of my bed.

The head of the bed is up on post concrete blocks which I got at Lowe's. We had to take the castor off the legs of the bed to fit in the space made for the post. I highly recommend the blocks to anyone with issues. Makes a huge difference. I put felt pads down in the holes so the leg is not scrapping against the concrete.

I had to look it up because it was bugging me. The block is concrete. Cement is used to hold all the materials together to make the block.

I also got a power strip that plugs into the wall socket sideways, so it has a very thin profile. It is plugged into a socket behind my bed and the strip is mounted to the wall next to my bed. That keeps my cords high. So I can have a device plugged in on my nightstand or in bed with me. And the cords do not get tangled and the strip does not flip around.


Example of sideways plug - the black one (not the gray one).

And that power strip is attached to my wall using Command strips (where you pull the tab to release it from the wall when you want to disconnect the whole thing years down the road). I got the mega weight command strips. There is a strip on the top of the power strip and on the bottom of the power strip. I did not want to mount it to wall with screws. This way I can move it. Or can take it down as technology evolves.

My iphone is the top cord. My ipad is the next cord. An old cell phone is the last cord, so I can always call 911 from that phone if somehow my iphone is not there.

Father's Day Collection

Karen Anderson with one of my very favorite Father's Day posts.

College/trade school boy ideas

If you remember, I sent my nephew card games. 

I had a very hard time coming up with that idea, but was very pleased when I finally did.

He is starting a trade school.

Just (last week) moved into an apartment with three boys he has never met.

My brother sent his address to me.

I happened to get it the same day I was meeting middle and her boy for dinner.

I mentioned I wanted to send something to my nephew, I always have (sent things) to his sister in college, but said I was having a very hard time thinking of non-food things for him.

I can fill a box to a girl in about five minutes in Target.

Boys are a bit trickier.

Middle's boy had very good suggestions. These will last me a while. And I will ask for more, he is a good source.

The first one is a good quality over the back of the door basketball hoop.

I ordered this one (below) from Amazon. The second picture shows an extra (soft) ball I sent too. I read a lot of reviews before settling on those two items. Hopefully they are good.

Another idea middle's boy had (will send later) is a velcro type dart board. (Suggestions of brands or types welcome in comments please, I am sure they are not all created equal.)

Then he (middle's boy) also suggested posters. I will ask my brother for very specific ideas. That is another good idea. Bare walls are not very homey.

I have had a couple texts from nephew, he is adjusting well. Likes the other guys. They have been gaming and cooking, waiting for classes to start.

Father's Day

Karen Anderson (2011) with one of my very favorite Father's Day posts.

If you have college or graduate school age guys in your life, you might have noticed this trend . . .

Beards.

Some of these guys grew beards as part of the No-Shave November movement. And then just kept them.

Some grew them as a bit of rebellion coming out of high schools with strict no facial hair policies.

Some grew them because they were finally able and wanted to show every other guy they knew that they could (a definite guy thing).

Some grew them because they have baby faces and realized they would look older with a beard.

Oldest (who did grow a beard last winter) says he thinks it is a reverse percentages thing. Because beards are not worn by the majority, they are desirable to a minority who want to look different. We have not yet seen his beard in person, will see him later this summer.




And if these boys have steady girl friends, whom they spend a lot of time kissing, they need to know about rinse out conditioners.

A good rinse out conditioner softens a beard hugely (and prevents beard burn on their girl friends).

Beard burns hurt (and show).

It is news to most younger guys that they need to condition their beard to protect their girlfriend's skin.

College Prep

With each kid, we learn a little more.

We are on the third kid.

The year before middle started high school, the oldest sat down with her and mapped out classes for four years of high school.  That class plan changed very little over her high school years. She also took one college class per semester her junior and senior high school years (at a local college). She knew where she was going to college and that she would be duel early childhood ed (ece) and early special ed (espce) major. So, we were able to coordinate between the two colleges to be sure the local college classes counted toward her long term college requirements.

Youngest is a sophomore. She and I sketched a four year plan for high school classes when she was in 8th grade. She made several adjustments to that plan last year, looking forward to her next three years. Earlier this week, we adjusted that plan again, looking to her junior and senior years. We also have a call into the same local college where middle and oldest took classes (while in high school) to talk about possible classes for her senior year. It looks as if she will be half days 3 classes at high school and 2-3 college classes each semester her senior year. The college classes count toward her high school credits, so planning is required to make sure all high school requirements are met.

We have learned to really plan ahead, looking at college as they are in high school.

An example of learning the hard way -
Oldest did not take calculus in high school and it bit him in the butt. It was difficult for him to do well jumping into required calculus class at the college level. He ended up using a tutor for the entire semester. He knew it was going to be tough, so he hired the tutor before the class even started. He also attended all study tables organized by the calculus class teaching assistant. He passed with an -A. He didn't retain much. But he passed with a good grade. The skills from calculus do not apply to his current doctorate work. So that class was simply all about doing what he had to do for his GPA.

Middle did not need calculus as ece/espce major.

Youngest might need calculus at college level. We don't know. We are prepping as if calc will be required at college. So we talked to the high school math department head (summer before her freshman year) to make sure of which math classes she needs each of the four years. Youngest rechecked with that same teacher (who she happens to have for honors adv algebra this year) to see which level of calculus she should take junior and senior year. If you have not been around high school in a while, there are several levels for many classes. So for example her teacher suggested pre-calculus/trig (honors) her junior year and then depending on how she does will determine what level (there are two levels of AP) of AP (advanced placement) calc/trig she takes her senior year. There is also a college level calc/trig available to her senior year, but we suspect that might be too stressful. We think it might be better to take two years of high school calc and then take it in college (if required).


When we looked at high school classes when youngest was in 8th grade, she was not sure what she might want to study in college. She also did not know what college she might attend. Now she thinks she is interested in some type of computer degree. And she probably will attend one of three catholic colleges.  So we reworked her high school class plan to allow her to take computer classes offered there.

When we meet with the local college, we are asking what computer classes might be available there.

Oldest took English comp, business, psychology, and maybe a history class at college, two per semester, his senior year in high school, while going half days to high school. I think all these just counted toward his electives at college. He did not know his major in advance.

Middle took psychology, eng comp, speech, and one other class, one per semester, her junior and senior year in high school. She went to high school full time her junior year but had one study hall. She went half days her senior year. At the Christmas break her sophomore year in college, she was a junior (class credit wise). She takes 17-18 hours, easily, deans list each semester, at college.

Yes, college classes are offered at high school (now). But I think being in an actual college classroom, with a college professor, prepares the kids for college better than a college class at high school. It is just not the same.

Even if the college credits (earned while in high school) did not count toward their college (not all credits transfer to every college), the experience of doing the college level work is really valuable to their long term success.

Youngest has talked to oldest repeatedly about high school class choices, local college class choices, potential future (4 year) colleges.

My husband and I both went to college and each earned a BA. But we were not smart about it. We would have done many things differently if we had known. And this is not hindsight speaking. This is the fact that we did not have guidance at the time. We certainly did not have parents or older siblings planning with us. I have no older siblings. Husband has one of his three older sibs who actually could have been a mentor, but wasn't. All four parents were no help at all.

There are a lot of things we could have planned better for oldest, but for the first kid, we did not do too badly. He is in a doctorate program (and doing well, knock on wood) after all. But yes, we know and he knows there are smarter choices we could have made.

And as I said, even though he is far away on the east coast, he is very involved with the girls.

He was coordinating with middle's new car all fall. He told me she needed a Garmin and which one to get too (he was right, and actually I went and got it without arguing, I trust his judgement).

He is coordinating with high school/college planning with youngest all these four years too.

I think that is important for the girls (he is a wealth of information, if something happened to my husband and I, they would be used to counting on/coordinating with oldest already) and also important for his growth as a man (men should love, honor, serve the women in their lives). 

My books - Their Eyes Were Watching God (1937) by Zora Neale Hurston

This is the second selection in my quest to read a couple Black History books this month.

Zora Neale Hurston was an African American writer.

Wiki wrote:
The novel narrates main character Janie Crawford's "ripening from a vibrant, but voiceless, teenage girl into a woman with her finger on the trigger of her own destiny". Set in central and southern Florida in the early 20th century, the novel was initially poorly received for its rejection of racial uplift literary prescriptions. Today, it has come to be regarded as a seminal work in both African-American literature and women's literature. Time included the novel in its 2005 list of the 100 best English-language novels published since 1923.

Here is the context section from Sparknotes on Their Eyes Were Watching God. Even if you have no interest in the book, you might consider reading this section as it is very unusual and interesting.

I also listened to a The Big Read discussion at the National Endowment for the Arts. I am always thrilled when one of the books I am reading pops up on their list. These commentaries are most excellent. (This was also available in CD form from my library.)

Here is a list of the contributors to this Big Read discussion. You will see some familiar names including Azar Nafisi who wrote Reading Lolita in Tehran.

These sources helped me to better appreciate Hurston's book. I am not saying the book was difficult. It was not. It was easy to understand. Those context resources just helped me to understand the history/placement of the book.

I read as if I am taking a literature class (most of the time).  It stimulates my intellect to read this way. I no longer read for avoidance. I no longer link reading and eating. This (intellectual viewpoint in reading) helps me to handle anything (upsetting) in the book. I can tell where the boundaries are between the story and me/mine. There was nothing upsetting in this (Their Eyes Were Watching God) book. I am just talking about reading in general. Yes, I still skip some books. I skipped Sophie's Choice in 2012. I had read that book long ago and it was the source of nightmares for me for many years (that and the Trail of Tears).  The latest (skip) was Unbroken. It came up on one of my lists. My husband saw me start to download CD's in the computer. He said - I don't think you want to read that. I asked my therapist (she had read it and her grandson was reading it right when I asked) and she said to skip it also. 

Here are things I thought about as I read Their Eyes Were Watching God:

A while back, I watched a sociological documentary talking about the fact that about 20% of African American men live with and/or take care of their families. I had seen that percentage (80% who do not) in other studies. Hopefully that number is improving. The documentary was done from the point of view of the 20%. One of the participants described (themselves) as the silent 20% who are quietly living their lives, taking care of their families and staying out of the news.

I have read (and blogged) about Anna Quindlen and her marrying a boy friend or marrying a husband concept.

I also, after having been around a fair number of women from different cultures, I have the (personal) viewpoint that women will continue to raise their sons in the same cultural/historical way, even though they (these same women) do not like how the adult men of their same culture act. This is how I summarize my  (personal) thinking - you can take the boy out of X, but you can't take X out of the boy,  even if the boy was born and raised in totally different, more advanced country.  I would put my own grandmother in that category. As much as she loved her girls, she would have sold the whole lot of us if she thought it would advance her only son. And she really had no respect for him, or for her husband, but considered them more important than her daughters or granddaughters. She would argue to hear me say that. And during her life her daughters would have argued with me also, saying I did not understand. But after her death and my grandfathers death, they would agree.

Someone might read all that and think I can be racist and sexist in the same three paragraphs, but it is sociology to me. It is cultural. And that is (part of) what I thought as I read.

 Their Eyes Were Watching God was short. It was 6 CD's and 7.25 audible hours.

The dialectic and stories were extremely well done. The version I listened to was narrated by Michele-Denise Woods. She even sang in it. Truly great reading. There is also an audio version by Ruby Dee.

Somewhere I read an article comparing Their Eyes Were watching God to Huckleberry Finn. In my opinion that is fair if you take the ridiculous Tom Sawyer (who I cannot stand) out of it. I mention the idea because it gives a very general comparison. Part of what brings that to mind is that they are both southern books. And the story telling and dialect in each. However, Their Eyes Were watching God was a richer book with more depth, in my opinion.

If there is anyone out there who has read this book, Their Eyes Were watching God, I have a question about the ending for you. Did anyone ever get her the shot series? Did I miss it? Is it an oversight? Or a statement about what happens at the end of the book?

My books - The Awakening (72/56 foot debacle)

Wikipedia writes:

"The Awakening is a novel by Kate Chopin, first published in 1899. Set in New Orleans and the Southern Louisiana coast at the end of the nineteenth century, the plot centers around Edna Pontellier and her struggle to reconcile her increasingly unorthodox views on femininity and motherhood with the prevailing social attitudes of the turn-of-the-century South. It is one of the earliest American novels that focuses on women's issues without condescension. It is also widely seen as a landmark work of early feminism.

"The novel's blend of realistic narrative, incisive social commentary, and psychological complexity makes The Awakening a precursor of American modernism; it prefigures the works of American novelists such as William Faulkner and Ernest Hemingway and echoes the works of contemporaries such as Edith Wharton and Henry James. It can also be considered among the first Southern works in a tradition that would culminate with the modern masterpieces of Faulkner, Flannery O'Connor, Eudora Welty, Katherine Anne Porter, and Tennessee Williams."

This book was 5 audio hours, so a very quick read.

This is a book which might have bothered me a few years ago, but didn't bother the current me.

I realized where the story was going about 3/4 of the way through the book. So the ending did not come as a huge surprise, I was ready for it.